The EasyPeasy Way to Quit Porn: Review and My Experience

Want to quit porn? It’s not as hard you think.

This is what Fraser, or Hackauthor², posits as his main point, hence the name of his free, open-source ebook, The EasyPeasy Way to Quit Porn.

This article is not a summary of the book (he tells readers not to skip chapters). But I will mention the deep, right-away-usable gist of it.

easypeasy way to quit porn Pinterest Pin

“The human body is the most sophisticated object on the planet, but no species, even the lowest amoeba or worm, survives without knowing the difference between food and poison.” – Hackauthor², The EasyPeasy Way to Quit Porn

To start, let’s define some monsters.

The big and little monsters

stress monster and anxiety monster on either side of a bubble, in which is a brain, a spotlight, and a sexy silhouette on a smartphone screen

In The EasyPeasy Way to Quit Porn, Hackauthor² defines the big monster as the amalgamation of beliefs and thoughts that constitute reasons not to stop. This could be from scientific malinformation spreaders, people around us, our environment—say, a stressful job—our own beliefs (“it’s not bad”), or just habit. In his words, this guy is

“brainwashing, an illusion of entitlement that internet porn is some sort of prop or reward and life will never be the same without it”

Meanwhile, the little monster is a cranium goblin poking you and saying “just one more.” “It won’t be bad, it’ll feel good.” “I’ll quit after this time.” And other justifications.

PMO is another term that comes up. It means Porn, Masturbation, Orgasm, which he calls the “water slide.” More “relief”= more desire for “relief.”

Finally, there’s the shame monster and the maw-nster, but those I made up to fit the image below. Though they’re monsters for sure.

Can you name each monster?

Monsters of The EasyPeasy Way to Quit Porn: brainwashing, PMO, dopamine drops, and urge to PMO.

Despite these monsters being cute little guys in this diagram, they’re monsters that can keep you stuck for years. And they all have one thing in common.

They all come from fear.

Let’s start with Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.

Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Fulfill each layer of the pyramid to advance to the next. Physiological needs, safety needs, love and belonging, esteem, self-actualization.
Plateresca / Getty Images

I’m unsure whether to place fear in the physiological or safety needs category, but safety is a basic need. Fear convinces you your safety is compromised, and it can cause tunnel vision, intolerance, hate, hopelessness, shutting down, and a gnawing desire for anyone to take you out of it if you can’t do it yourself.

That’s the thing, though. You can shrink fear yourself.

Just as pain is partially constructed, so too is fear. Sometimes the monster exists, but sometimes you create it.

“It’s fear that keeps people from quitting, fear of that empty, insecure feeling they get when they stop flooding their brains with dopamine.”

“Like heroin addicts, all they’re really enjoying is the ritual of relieving those pangs.”

Plus my Instagram post months back:

Taming Your Tech Instagram post: "The enjoyment isn't the session itself; it's the ending of the agitation caused by the craving. The longer the "suffering," the more enjoyable each session becomes.

Like thirst, the longer you suffer, the tastier the drink when you finally get it. It’s especially hard at the 7-day mark when testosterone peaks. A lot of us fail here and think it’s okay because at least we don’t look every day. But how agonizing those six days must be when we feel we’re “deprived!” Then the reward is so much better, so much more anticipated and craved.

So remember,

“It’s not that users are generally stupid people, it’s just that they’re miserable without porn.”

And addicts believe only the drug can relieve the suffering and make them happy.

Here’s the reality, though.

Line graph: lots of porn=short happy then miserable, less happy over time; no porn = zig-zag between high and medium pleasure over time

(white = no porn; orange = porn 2x a week; red = lots of porn)

(See my 2-part series on the pleasure-pain balance for scientific evidence of this.)

My experience with The EasyPeasy Way to Quit Porn has shown proven to me I used to look at it (back then) to avoid the pain of worthlessness. See if you can relate.

Porn makes everything worse

silhouettes of sexily posing women with the word "LOVE" on a neon sign behind them... and a giant X over the whole picture. Porn is not love.

Due to an event in my childhood, I have a wound in self-worth. This led me to pursue mostly “romantic” porn: that is, committed relationship, smiley, love-over-lust porn.

“Romantic porn” made me feel at once good enough to be attractive, but simultaneously like crap because the guys were skinny, muscular, didn’t wear glasses, and had money (or I believed they did when it wasn’t apparent). I learned to stop comparing myself, but every now and then I needed a “shot of love.”

I used to self-harm and once even tried to kill myself by cutting open my wrist out of porn FOMO. Constantly, I put myself down, and everyday music from country to hip-hop pissed me off. They were all good enough.

But The EasyPeasy Way to Quit Porn taught me I was using this “romantic porn” whenever my ego took a hit. I didn’t try new things out of fear of failure, and I became so perfectionist my self-talk made me suicidal.

Now I build self-worth through Daily Quests. I invented a whole program based on 7 books and upwards of 70 scientific papers to claw out of that pit of self-hate and porn addiction.

That book is Quests: Habit Change for Addicted Warriors, and I hope it helps you as it has me.

The EasyPeasy Way to Quit Porn ultimate takeaways

  • Feeling “deprived” gives you a false sense of “needing” porn to be happy, and it increases craving.
  • Willpower is a backup generator when an especially strong storm hits, but don’t rely on it. Instead, substitute what need it provides for you, and work on building that need through healthy outlets every day.

The more “deprived” we feel, the more we exalt the release from it. This can turn us into frothing, miserable worshippers. Junk food won’t fill you up; find what does.

In The EasyPeasy Way to Quit Porn, Hackauthor² suggests that to find yours, ask yourself:

  • Why do you have to have porn, panic setting in if you don’t?
  • What negative emotion are you avoiding?

Then find another way to tame that lightning. (Try humanization— science proves it extinguishes arousal.)

“Deprived” is an excuse your brain invented to keep you away from acute pain caused by cravings. That’s all.

The EasyPeasy Way to Quit Porn's way out. No brainwashing = freedom. (All the monsters are jailed.)

It’s only when “deprived” that porn becomes precious.

Lastly, this is a boildown, but it’s nowhere near everything. Without more help, you can’t beat the big monster. So I encourage you to read the full book at https://easypeasymethod.org, or you won’t get the full benefit.

Other helpful resources:


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